Cursing and swearing are terrible habits as I’m sure we all know. It’s a very bad habit that’s unfortunately become a common phenomenon in our world. We’re constantly bombarded with expletives whether it be from music, movies, social media, etc. The question is, how did we develop this terrible habit? There’s a number of ways it can sneak into our daily vocabulary. One thing’s for sure is human’s love to fit in and copy the latest trends. Denzel Washington curses in all his movies. The elders in our families curse when something isn’t right. Perhaps one of the biggest drivers is our friends. We end up developing this habit when we grow up hearing it and surround ourselves with people who have potty mouths. Here are some short tips that can hopefully inspire you to stop cursing:
1. Be familiar with what gets you triggered
What are the triggering actions that lead to us cursing? It’s essentially the “whys” and “whens” of the habit. Once you recognize the triggers you’ll be better able to control your feelings that prompt you to curse. Figure out what situations and people make you more prone to cursing.
Environment: So this is interesting. Evaluate your environment. Do you find yourself cursing when your around certain people? Is it when your typing over text? If your frequently associating with people who don’t guard their tongue it’s only a matter of time before you start using the same profane words as them. This is the problem with people who suffer from little or no self-restraint. They get desensitized and immune to profanity and it doesn’t bother them. Best policy is, limit, or eliminate your exposure to such toxic environments.
Anger: Anger. Such a dangerous emotion. Anger always brings out the worst in individuals. Along with that comes a heavy dosage of profanity. It’s important to understand that yes, you don’t have control over every situation, however you can most definitely control your response. Take note of your physical senses that typically occur before the actual reaction and let them pass. Don’t blurt out something that your gonna regret later.
Delusion: A lot of times people will curse because it simply makes them feel cool. It grabs attention. You feel like your adding expletives will somehow make the conversation so much more interesting, while your actually hurting yourself and others around you.
2. Be accountable for your words
Yes! Be accountable for your actions and stop blaming others. “I only cursed because so and so said this.” Sorry, but this isn’t going to fly. Try to understand that your not bettering yourself by having this horrible habit. The sooner you let it loose the better it’ll be for you in the long run. Let your friends know that from this day forth you will be profanity free, or at least extremely limited in your cursing. Its human nature to take things more seriously when we know that someone is constantly hovering over our shoulders watching us to hold us accountable for our actions.
3. Improve your identity
What you do repeatedly ultimately forms your identity. If you wear jeans every day, that’s part of your identity. If your cursing everyday and it’s common for others to hear curse words coming out of your mouth, know that that’s part of your reputation now. The truth is, cursing will severely diminish your potential to be a better Muslim. It may not seem like it, but your choice of words has a pretty big impact on you. Cursing might portray you as an abusive, negative, sexist, profane person all because you have a poor choice of words. People will probably lose respect for you because you can’t control your tongue. Just remember every time your about to curse, think to yourself, do you really want this word to be engrained with your identity?
4. Find better quality company
Yeah, this is important. I know it was semi-addressed in the first portion, but I want it to be reiterated.
“A man is upon the religion of his best friend, so let one of you look at whom he befriends.”
Source: Sunan Abu Dawud
There’s no doubt that we’re influenced by the company we keep. I can guarantee you, it’s nearly impossible to talk normally around people who talk with such foul language. Making this decision may not be easy, but Allah (swt) will never leave you in the dark and your decision to leave the bad company will insh’Allah lead you to better friends.
Cursing and swearing is not an innate habit. It’s something which is learned. It can definitely be corrected with the proper determination and effort. It ties back into the idea of self control and being able to control your tongue. Humans are the best of creations and along with that we need to master the art of modesty in our words. We should all resolve to give up this sin and choose to speak properly, emulating our beloved Prophet Muhammad (saw).